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tracy248
Newbie
Posts: 2
Registered: 01-02-2005 Location:
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posted on 01-02-2005 at 22:13 |
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Did I lose my virginity?
I am dating this guy. This weekend we were kissing and he started to rub my vagina on the outside and then he fingered me. And it hurt really bad. He fingered me on three separate occasions. On the last occasion I went to the bathroom and there was a thick red pinkish fluid on the tissue. I don't know if he broke my hymen with his finger or it was leftover discharge from my period which had stopped about three days ago. Two out of those three occasions he rubbed his penis on the outside of my vagina enough to where he could finish. And it hurt then too. It hurt so much it felt like he was inside of me. But I made sure that he wasn't because I was guiding him to make sure that he didn't. All I know is that this is one mistake I will not make again. My question is if I am still a virgin after what we did. I have been saving myself all this time and I didn't want to mess it up over something like this. Can someone please give me some advice. Thanks.
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tracy248
Newbie
Posts: 2
Registered: 01-02-2005 Location:
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posted on 01-02-2005 at 22:24 |
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I also had another question. If my hymen was broken since I did find a few drops of thick fluid if I did eventually have intercourse does this mean I won't bleed again?
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guyvirgin1977
Member
Posts: 61
Registered: 10-03-2004 Location: Springfield Missouri
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posted on 01-03-2005 at 06:01 |
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Hi Tracy,
Well if you haven't read my other posts then let me state that oral sex and anal sex are still sex. If you don't already know that I will attach an explanation on the bottom.
You say that your boyfriend got off by prolonged contact with your skin.... that is sex. However Don't go thinking that you might as well go have all the sex in the world now....You made a mistake, we all makes mistakes...That DOES NOT MEAN YOU HAVE TO KEEP MAKING THAT MISTAKE! Start really saving yourself for marriage right now, From this point on. You will have to tell your future husband what you did....you messed up...once...then tell him exactly what you told us...... if you start abstinence right now you will be able to tell him that for 3 years, 4 years, 5 years, or what ever length of time it is that you have waited for him, That you have been saving yourself for that long for him, you have practiced discipline in your life and you can be trusted.
Telling a guy that is a WHOLE lot better than telling him that he is sexual partner number 14.
You can start over today and become a born again virgin.
I already posted this under "should I wait ?"but I think it will certainly answer your question so I will post it again here
Alright, take a deep breath and say it with me: "Oral SEX."
Ever since the whole Bill Clinton/Monica Lewinsky thing, oral sex has been on everyone's lips (excuse the pun). The Clinton scandal raised a bunch of issues: Is oral sex considered "sex"? If you have oral sex, but "don't go all the way" (have vaginal intercourse), are you still a virgin? And is oral sex safe — or can it pass infection? (More on that later . . .)
According to some recent studies, most teenagers define "sex" as vaginal intercourse — they don't consider oral sex to be "sex." This isn't surprising, since that's how our culture has traditionally defined sex (which, incidentally, leaves out gays and lesbians altogether). So, there are a lot of self-proclaimed virgins out there who haven't "gone all the way," but will do "everything else but," including oral sex.
The abundance of these "technical virgins" definitely has a lot to do with how society views virginity — as a really big deal, especially for girls. Whether you lose your virginity on prom night or on your wedding night, it's your first time and it'd better be perfect and with the "right" person —
It is true that some people believe that an intact hymen — is proof of a woman's virginity. But many people don't believe the condition of the hymen is adequate for defining virginity. They know that it's possible for a woman's hymen to become stretched open even if she's never had vaginal intercourse.
Many teens say that "having sex" is considered slutty, but "just fooling around" is no big deal. Whether you're having intercourse or "just" outercourse — sex play that doesn't involve vaginal intercourse, like oral sex — many of the same issues apply.
Despite what some people might think or say, oral sex does count — because just as with intercourse, there can be emotional and physical consequences to consider.
When we talk about risk, it's often in reference to physical issues like sexually transmitted infections and pregnancy. But like intercourse, outercourse is sex play that also involves emotional risks. Will having oral sex change how you think about yourself and about your relationship? Will you expect more commitment or emotional closeness from your partner? Will you be doing it for the wrong reasons — like, because you think everyone else is doing it or because your partner is putting pressure on you?
It's true that if someone is only having oral sex, there's no worry about getting pregnant. But the physical risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection is there. Studies show that teenagers, and the majority of adults, rarely use protection — a condom or dental dam — when having oral sex. Why? Explanations range from, "What's the point?" to, "I don't think it's a high-risk activity."
The risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection from oral sex is lower than it is from vaginal or anal intercourse — but there's still a risk. There are only a few cases in which people may have contracted HIV through oral sex. But infections such as gonorrhea, syphilis, and herpes can be transmitted by having unprotected oral sex, too.
When it comes to oral sex, if you're not with a partner whom you know does not have an infection, then using protection during oral sex is key to reduce the risk of passing infection.
And all of this applies not only to teenagers, but also to everyone — including the president of the United States.
how many believe that no matter what sexual acts you engage in, you can still consider yourself a virgin as long as a penis doesn't enter your vagina?
It seems that maybe the rules are loosening a bit on this one, with some people being convinced that oral sex is not sex. In other words, you can blow the entire football team, deal out a few thousand handjobs, receive oral until you're raw, and even go for the occasional anal sex, but still say you're a virgin, if it's only by the slimmest of technicalities?
So do you think that even if a girl has a five-some--- gives a blowjob to a one, whilst simultaneously giving hand jobs to two strangers while getting shagged up the butt by the fourth , she has the right to consider herself a virgin? Is there really anyone out there delusional enough to think that she is a virgin?
Let's be honest. Any time a penis is inserted into ANY bodily orifice, or genitals come into prolonged physical contact with someone's mouth, virginity is lost. Granted, it's not quite the same as going "all the way," but it IS sexual contact, there IS insertion of some kind or another, and there is, ideally anyway , some kind of orgasm.
If you still aren't convinced then please answer these questions yes or no.
Are lesbians who have been given oral sex till they are raw still virgins?
Are homo men who get it up the butt till they are bloody still virgins?
What we've managed to do to virginity would be like rewording the Ten Commandments so that everyone feels that they haven't really committed any sins.
There are those women that believe that if they perform oral sex on every boyfriend they've ever had, and let him get his fingers sticky every now and then, that they're still virgins. Now they may bleed a bit the first time they have sex, but are they really virgins?
They have experience. I mean if she just lies there the first time you insert your member, but can play the flute on your instrument like she's written symphonies, has she really maintained her purity? At what point do we draw the line? When has the line between purity and experience been crossed?
I personally don't think that a girl who can inhale a kielbasa like it's a toothpick necessarily connotes the virgin type. If virginity lies in a hole and is not about experience, then our society has a very warped definition of what virginity really is.
Believe it or not, there are gals out there who will let you get into their anal canals, but will still aver that they are virgins. Anal sex, as well as oral sex (despite what Clinton says), has the word "sex" attached to it because that's exactly what it is. And once you have sex, you are no longer a virgin. Case closed.
So these women are under the illusion that as long as their vaginas remain untouched by the almighty penis, they can still claim to be pure. Pure crud, that is. And if men seem to think that this is a viable argument, then they're just horny and have no qualms about taking the back way in.
If you have had oral or anal sex already and you are thinking That you might as well go and have all the sex you want because you are not a virgin anyway, please rethink this. You can become a recycled virgin at anytime. You can have a second chance at being a born again virgin. Start really saving yourself for marriage from this point on. Then when you get married 3 years, 4 year, 10 years from now you can look at your spouse on your wedding night and say "I've waited for you for X amount of years. I've shown discipline in my life I can be trusted" Now that is special.
In a world were 7 out of 10 married couples under the age of 40 have some sort of infidelity you need spouse you can trust. What you do now is very indicative of what anyone can expect of you in the future.
If you don't control your sexuallity now why would anyone believe you would in the future?
I myself am a 27 year old virgin now and I only date virgins or time proven born again virgins who have been completely abstinent a minimum of 2 years, It might have to be longer depending on their previous sexual experience.
Anyone can change but sometimes you have to prove you have changed.
TRUE LOVE WAITS!
Any Questions? feel free to email me cheesguy1977@yahoo.com
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