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automat
Newbie
Posts: 4
Registered: 06-30-2008 Location:
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posted on 06-30-2008 at 23:58 |
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23 year old male virgin - how to lose it?
Hi everyone. So glad I found this forum (and to think, all I had to do was google "virgin" & "forum"). Seems to be a lot people in the same plight as me.
First of all, let me just say i'm a 23 year old male virgin, and have always had trouble meeting girls (I never go to nightclubs, bars - they practically scare me, I feel like a fish out out water). Unfortunately, this has left me very socially "inadequate" over the years and barely ever meet new people at all, let alone girls.
(A lil' background - it started when i was 10/11, i was tongue tied (and was until i was 20) and couldn't french kiss (or so i thought, i couldn't stick my tongue out of my mouth at all) when (almost) all the kids were just experimenting with this, i was just too embarassed. I left primary school for a boy's grammar and barely saw any girls for years (there was a strange lack of girls my age range in and around my neighbourhood (quite rural)). Everyone developed without me as I grew older and was left behind. The older I get the harder it gets (I'm sure a lot of you know this one!).
Anyway sorry about all the blurb, but I feel I need to convey my entire situation (hope ur still reading!). Since the operation (which bloody hurt!), I have passionately kissed a few girls (one of which was a 37-year old woman!), but never had any real feeling for them. Consequently, I ended up in bed with the woman, but it just ended up as a drunken naked fumble. She could probably tell i didn't really know what i was doing.
Neway, recently I have met a good-looking, petite brunette girl who really likes me. The only thing is she's 17 and way more experienced than me (she has a 1-year old girl by an estanged father), and is socially pretty confident. I'm not worried about the age gap as such (she'll eat ME for breakfast for f**k sake), just that when (not if) she finds out i'm a virgin she's not gonna take it too well. As I read on another post, teenage girls don't think too highly of virgins, and that sounds about right. I don't think she'd be very mature or understanding about it, trust me. Or even particularly impressed.
Is this dead in the water, if she too young (i wish i could find a nice undderstanding girl in her 20's), should i forgoe yet another possible opportunity to shake off this curse. It could go horribly wrong, but shouldn't I take that chance?
I know a lot of people are gonna reply with "don't do it " for various reasons, but I need to lose it NOW! It's become the bain of my life. For a while now I've thought about seeing an escort in London (of which I've seen no mention of on this forum as of yet), just to get it over and done with. I noticed a lot of straight-heads (no offense) on here that will immediately denounce this suggestion, but please understand it from my point of view, a secular 23 year man living in the 21st century. It's just so socially unacceptable, and I'm missing out on life because of it. Also I could have a good thing with this girl, but there's no way I can let her know she's taken a 23-year old's virginity, and I don't want to lie to her by ommision.
Sorry for the painfully long post (and all the brackets ), it obviously means a LOT to me. If anyone can find the time to read all this and give me any feedback, I will be eternally grateful. There's nobody I can talk about this to. Thank God for computers.
Peace.
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ant3k
Newbie
Posts: 3
Registered: 07-17-2008 Location:
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posted on 07-17-2008 at 18:20 |
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reply
I'm a 20 year old virgin. 21 in 6 months time.
With regard to the escort, it is something I have considered, but I once read somewhere that it wont fix it because anyone can do that at any time!
And in your case (and mine too) it seems the virginity isn't the only issue here. It is confidence to talk to girls in the general single hotspots such as nightclubs and bars.
Using an escort wouldn't solve your confidence in talking to people in bars to find someone you are happy with. I'm not saying either way, but it is something to consider.
With regard to the 17 year old again, again I am not saying either way - but one thing to do is not to think so negatively. You say WHEN she finds out. But who cares, assuming you had sex then you would no longer be a virgin so it doesn't matter. Worst case scenario you don't get a long afterwards, but you would no longer be a virgin, you'd know of how you are at sex and have a little confidence boost, and her taunts wouldn't be so bad.
With regard to teenagers, it depends. But honestly I don't think too many people care. At the end of the day, having a child at 17 and being a single mum isn't that desireable so she isn't in the perfect position to judge others.
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Matto
Newbie
Posts: 2
Registered: 10-05-2008 Location:
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posted on 10-05-2008 at 15:51 |
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hold up dude
considering how old this post is....
The deeds probably been done already.
But I would say to anyone in a similar predicament. DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT pursue someone who's this young. EVER. I was seduced by a 19 year old, and I'm 23...that was a big big mistake. Still a virgin, but still. Never would i consider someone who's 17. Thats just too much.
These girls are just too young...and still immature. You should try and stick with people your age. I know understand how hard it can be to pass up someone whos 19 when your my age and just desperate as all hell for any kind of female contact. But even so. 17? REALLY? come on dude, have some self respect.
Believe me. It'll be less troublesome in the long run.
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